Gathering Personal Information Discreetly

Gathering personal information discreetly can be a challenging endeavor. Most people are naturally guarded to some extent and it can be difficult to get around those defenses.

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PII is defined as any personal data that can distinguish or trace an individual’s identity (including names, social security numbers, date and place of birth, mother’s maiden name, biometric records). Gathering PII can be direct or indirect.

Be Mindful of What You Share

People tend to become guarded when someone is trying to crowbar information out of them and it’s important to be mindful of the personal information you share. Whenever possible, it’s best to be open and honest with individuals from the outset about why, what, how, and with whom their information will be shared.

Increasingly, however, individuals are at the whim of large organizations such as direct marketers and credit bureaus that view them as lifeless data floating like microscopic entities in vast electronic chambers, to be captured, examined, collated, and sold without their consent or control.

It’s therefore vital to understand privacy policies and regularly monitor your online presence for information that should be concealed or made public. However, sometimes sharing is unavoidable. Thankfully, there are a few ways to do so discreetly.

Don’t Be Afraid to Deflect the Conversation

It’s important to be able to deflect the conversation when you feel that someone is prying for information that you want to keep private. This might be a bit of a middle ground between shutting down or stonewalling, but it’s really just giving really short and non-committal responses to questions.

Another way to deflect is to bring up a new topic altogether. For example, if you’re trying to get information about a friend’s relationship status and they are defensive, try talking about their work instead. This can make them feel more open and willing to share. If you want to get more specific, try changing your body language.